Going the whole distance is important in many areas of life, no less when creating new habits. A few weeks ago I began three new habits with the help of the app Habit List to track my progress. As of today I have meditated, written and read everyday for the last 22 days. As you can imagine I am pretty pleased with myself because I am often full of great ideas, but lacking in the implementation of them. I have also failed at a few habits that I set for myself at the same time as the successful ones, so I want to mention those too.
Why were you successful at some habits but not others?
I've had time to reflect on the last few weeks of habit making and have come to a simple conclusion, I have a short attention span. This is by no means a revelation to those that no me; I can day dream better than I can breathe. However it is important to be aware of when I am trying to focus my energy on something new. Like every other normal human being I have all the good intentions in the world to improve and challenge myself. But setting unrealistic, multiple goals is not going to work in the long term. That is why I have succeeded at some habits and failed at others.
How can you improve in these other areas?
It comes down to a couple of points. Set stupidly easy goals. I know I want to run another marathon this year, but I am not running regularly at the moment. In order to achieve my aspirational goals I have to start with small steps. My meditation works because I set a stupidly low target to achieve and am not often doing much more than the three minute goal I aim for. Once I have been consistent for a month with my new easy goal I know that I will be able to do it whatever mood I am in, no matter what life throws at me. Habits don't require motivation, so stop searching for it.
The Second point is that I feel I have a limited amount of energy to give out for tasks in life. I've started to see it in a simple metaphorical way. I imagine the energy I have as coins to spend. I can waste them on worrying, procrastination and idleness or I can invest them in producing, learning and improving. Right now my focus has shifted to work and education, so I now have daily "coin" commitments for those things. Training has taken a back seat of late, so I will spend a little coinage on that. Then there is communication with friends and family. Importantly the old romance sector needs constant investment because it's a team game. Then there is the writing on my book, which needs a lot more attention. Soon you can see how my coins might get used up and that's not including anything that life might throw in the way, day to day annoyances and challenges at work. All I need to do is do a little everyday on each of these things and not strive for magnificence before I've put in the hard yards to get there. Trying and failing are my new friends for learning.
Where to now?
I used to feel that I had wasted my life and that I had lost my joie de vivre. But life is terribly short and what has been before and what will come are inconsequential. This moment is the most important moment we have. Taking action now and living the moment with no guarantee that you will get another tomorrow should be our only motivation. "Momento Mori" is my new motivation to achieve something of significance with the time I have. It's a far cry from the time when I considered ending my own life, but from the ashes we rise again.
I've done a 20 minute meditation, read several pages of my book and have written this already this morning. Now I am off for a short run before I focus on work. Here's to taking action everyday.
Tom
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